rotten bananas

The FCC is complaining about Prince’s halftime show because of a ‘phallic’ reference. At a point in the show, Prince played his guitar behind a large sheet which had his shadow projected onto it. The fashion in which he was holding his guitar created an image that slightly resembled a penis.

This is a complete outrage, but I hardly think that the NFL can be held responsible, or even the artist formerly known as the artist formerly known as some weird symbol and also formally known as Prince. This goes back much further than that. The real culprit that should be blamed for such a catastrophe is the inventor of the guitar. I mean, what was (s)he thinking having people hold it that way? Obviously it was part of some international (interplanetary?) underground coup on modern decency. There’s a reason so many rock stars have promiscuous sexual habits. I’m a guitar player myself, and I can attest to the thrill of not only rocking out, but also feeling as if I’m pleasuring myself while I do it.

But, all that aside, let’s not take our anger out on royalty because we can’t get to true source. It’s not his fault that that’s how you hold a guitar. This is something we cannot control. A much more worthwhile undertaking would be redesigning the guitar for a more politically correct presentation. We can complain about Prince or Keith Richards or Jimmy Page forever, but that won’t change anything.

For real.

The problem is that the FCC (and the undoubtedly large number of overprotective housewives that caused the uprising) have had nothing of substance to complain about (or more likely, they’re just not looking). I watch prime time on occasion, and I can attest to plenty of instances to where the penis is actually referenced. Yet, I don’t see any hubbub over those.

People are actually loosening up a bit (or networks are being more compliant - but I doubt it), but the FCC still has to justify its existence. This is where the creation of an enemy comes in. They’re creating their own meaning, which is often a great idea, but not when you’re just being an annoyance. When it gets to the point where you’re really stretching to find something to complain about, it’s time to think about downsizing or finding a new hobby.